my attitude toward this counrty is not the same when i landed 4 days ago. i came to central america with a strong prejudice against hispanic men; i expected this to be a very lonely, anxious week. to date, i feel as at home as i have ever. in fact, spending time away from the states is like getting away from a bullying older brother. i am so grateful that i am not a member of the republican secret society. i am caught up in where will i go when i move away, what will i do, etc etc, but that's a semester or two away.
many of my prejudices have been dissolved, my fear of speaking spanish has given way to solid conversational, and my fair skin is ever so slightly kissed with equatorial sun. today was cold, maybe brushing 50 with strong winds whistling through the palm trees. walking through the streets, one looks up and sees the volcano, the mountain in the distance. the sky a pal blue with cliche'd white cottony clouds stretched gingerly, the citizens bronzed and kind and happy to be here.
i am filtering more through the new way my brain has been thinking, and i find that i am growing years in months, mentally, it seems. my attitudes and the exolution of my thoughts is an incredible process to behold: contemplating the responsibility every person has to follow the course of the universe, as one misstep on your part can disrupt the lives of many others. look at adam and eve, the consummate fuck-ups. imagine where we'd be if they had never done what they did.
i want to come back to el salvador and surf.